Talking is my forte. Writing is harder, but here we are. I need an outlet. Motherhood has changed me, for the better I’m pretty sure but it leaves me wanting more. Which is strange given how all consuming momming is but it has awoken a new passion in me. I desperately want to help other moms, forge connections, and create a more supportive community.
My daughter was born in the second year of my husband’s residency in Northeast Ohio where our closest family is a good six or seven hour drive away. My mom thankfully came for six weeks at the beginning but I still needed more help. It wasn’t until around four months postpartum that I realized I had full blown postpartum anxiety which wasn’t manageable with therapy. I think it had a lot to do with the extreme sleep deprivation between her reflux and the hubs schedule but there I was unable to function in daily life without panic attacks.
Thankfully I adapted to Sertraline (generic Zoloft) in a few weeks and stayed with my parents in that time until I could resume normal activities. I still feel panicky sometimes but I’ve learned so many tools and that this is totally normal. Having a child is hands down the hardest thing you will ever do (and if not then I commend you and wonder what else you have done in life!?). I thought I was independent and self-sufficient enough to tackle motherhood pretty much solo since residency is all consuming for my partner but I was so not prepared. There is no way to be fully prepared but I do wish I had known more about the postpartum period and what is now referred to as the fourth trimester by many experts and moms.
The last twenty months, and counting, have taught me a lot about compassion and grace. I want to help other moms find comfort, solidarity, and humor in whatever stage of mothering they happen to be in. Most of all though I want to feel like I am supporting the mom tribe in whatever way I can because it is so hard and we/ I need other moms to thrive! I’m endeavoring to create this website as a starting point to provide stories and ideas, eventually adding a podcast, and even more eventually my services as a postpartum doula when we get settled in our life post residency. I have big dreams and little time as do all of us 🙂